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Fears and Tears

I have a knack for losing friends by trying to do what’s right.

When I was in high school, I had a really good friend whom I was super close to. She started drawing away at one point and during this rocky time I got a call from her out of the blue saying she had mixed meds and alcohol in an attempt to kill herself. I’m still not sure if she was calling to ask for help or to say goodbye, it was hard to tell what she was saying while she was crying. I told her I’d be right there, let my mom know we what was going on and she agreed to drive me to my friend’s house, I called her parents and told them what was going on. We arrived shortly after her parents had gotten home, they asked me what happened and then we left. The only time we really spoke after that was when she told me she never wanted to speak to me again. I don’t know where she is or how she is but I hope she’s alive and happy. I would tell her I miss her if I could.

That was the first. The latest occurrence was today. It’s a complicated situation but in short I was told by one of the three involved adults that Person C had been threatening to beat/kill/commit suicide and take with him Person A. This was not news and ground for which my friend, Person A, is leaving Person C. What was new, however, was that Person C was becoming even more verbally abusive, Person A was afraid he would escalate to physical violence any time especially since his drinking has been getting out of control and he is allegedly stealing hydrocodone from Person B as well.  Person A and Person C have two girls, 4 and 2… us all being military and my husband being a higher rank, he kind of had to report it when he found out. I cannot deny that I want this people to be safe, though. I can’t deny that I believe she should have been the one to report the abuse, the drinking, the drugs, the fact that he evidently hurts their girls (which I learned last night). Needless to say when Person C got called in behind closed doors at work, Person A called me to see if I had “called” on him. She feels betrayed. I don’t see that as an unreasonable reaction to the situation. I just don’t know how I could have done nothing and left Person A and her girls in a situation she claimed to be terrifying.

Maybe it wasn’t my place, maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. I know She told me these things in confidence but when it becomes a safety issue, especially for innocent bystanders like kids, once that line is crossed it’s crossed. I would feel betrayed, too. I’d like to think that part of me would appreciate the help…

Hopefully I’ll be done crying by the time I need to pick my eldest up…


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